Wednesday, 30 July 2008

chikkuu...chaaakkk...

chikkuu...chaaakkk...
we could see you...
especially your long legs hehehe...
kicking and leaping...
hope to see you soon in four weeks time....

Friday, 11 July 2008

emotional

wohoo...could not believe that i am so emotional this time round (me being pregnant). i could not remember being this emo when i was pregnant with ryan or maybe i was just too sick (quite a few time in and out of the hospital) to notice about it o^_^o. i think i do need to wear a sticker saying "handle with care" or "enter at your own risk" right across my forehead hahaha... poor b and my lil sis for needing to put up with me. i feel awful for them owh..poor me..hehehe... anyway, me and b are feeling excited of next week scan.

**ya Allah, bless us all**

Wednesday, 2 July 2008

"you"

mommy and daddy could see you sayang.. tee hee...
you were jumping up and down...
daddy said he can see you kicking...
mommy could see you moving your hand...
maybe u do not like it when the doctor poking mommy's tummy,
just to get a good view of you...
or maybe you are equally excited seeing us o^_^o
anyhow, we are blessed.

Friday, 27 June 2008

The Beats

I can hear it...
B can hear it too...
She definitely can hear it...
Vwooww..vwooww...vooww....
Steady and fast beating...
We want to hear it some more...
We hope to see you soon...

Monday, 16 June 2008

Cost of Living in Malaysia

I received this forwarded email from a friend of mine.
Not sure how far the truth of the story, but here goes...

Can A Family Man With Salary RM3,000 Survive In Malaysia ...!

Let's do some simple calculations here.

In Malaysia , the average family income is RM3,000 /month
(where father works, mother doesn't).

I understand there are many families whose
monthly income does not reach RM3,000,
but, to make things simple,
let's take RM3,000 as the figure. Ok lah, right?

Okay, let's start rolling with a family which has
Papa, Mama, 1 daughter and 1 son. Ngam-ngam ....



Calculation starts...

Electricity and water bill: RM100
(No air-con, No home theatre, No water heater ... ok?)

Phone bill ( Telekom): RM100
(Internet streamxy RM68 + land line RM25 = RM93, round-up to RM100 la)

Meals for a happy family: RM775
(3 meals on RM25/day 4 persons. Forget about makan in restaurant ya)

Papa makan / teh-tarik during working hrs: RM155
(RM5/day, RM5 ... can eat what?)

Car repayment: RM400
(A proton saga aeroback, 7 yrs repayment)

Petrol (living in city, traffic-jam) :RM300
(go to work, bring son to school, only can afford one car running. NO YET CONSIDER PETROL INCREASE 40.8%)

Insurance: RM650
(Kids, wife and self. Forget about insurance la..no money to pay, lets drop it)

House repayment: RM750
(low cost housing repayment for 30 yrs, retired still have to work to pay!)

Tuition: RM80
(got that cheap meh? i don't think so)

Older children pocket money @ school: RM20
(RM1/day, eat bread?)

School fees: RM30
(enough ah?)

School books and etc: RM100
(always got extra to pay in school)

Younger children milk powder: RM50
(cannot have the DHA, BHA, PHA one, expensive)

Miscellaneous: RM100
(shampoo, rice, sauce, toilet paper, saman, etc)

Oh wait!!! I have to stop here, so...
No Astro,
no movie @ cinema,
no DVD,
no CD,
no toys
no computer,
no KFC, no McDonald,
no insurance
no jalan-jalan makan angin (vacation)
no chit chat on phone with grandparents, and etc...
nothing breaks down for repair
Let's use a calculator to total up... WALAO EH! Sh*t! RM2,960 already...

EPF belum potong, income tax lagi........ oledi RM2,960!!!



How to survive lah tuan-tuan dan puan-puan sekalian ???
Our Deputy Prime Minister asked us to change lifestyle?
How to change? Don't eat? Don't work? Don't send children to school and study?
Besides that, I believe in Malaysia population, there are millions of rakyat Malaysia which still don't earn RM3,000/month!!! What is this? Inilah Malaysia Boleh... Sorry... it should be Malaysians Boleh, because we're still alive and kicking!!

Tuesday, 5 February 2008

Ryan Aziz

It's been a week since we lost our baby - Ryan Aziz.
Listening to song by Dewa "Hadapi Dengan Senyuman"
makes me cry and smile at the same time. The lyrics
are so meaningful and truthful. May Allah be merciful
and give us strength through this difficult time, insyaAllah.


Artist: DEWA
Song: HADAPI DENGAN SENYUMAN
Album: LASKAR CINTA (2004)
Source: lyricsandsongs

Hadapi dengan senyuman
Semua yang terjadi
Biar terjadi….
Hadapi dengan tenang jiwa
Semua... kan baik baik saja

Bila ketetapan tuhan
Sudah ditetapkan
Tetaplah sudah….
Tak ada yang bisa merubah
Dan takkan bisa berubah

Reff
Relakanlah saja ini
Bahwa semua yang terbaik
Terbaik untuk kita semua
Menyerahlah untuk menang

Friday, 1 February 2008

Burial

We woke up early this morning. B went to pick up Ryan Aziz and the placenta at the hospital and ensure all the documentation needed to bring him home for burial is settled. I couldn't accompany B as my feet are swollen up. Standing and walking around the hospital with my "elephant feet" don't seems fair,B told me. So, I waited patiently for their arrival and recite my zikir and doa. Mean while, my youngest sister prepared some dishes in the kitchen for our guests.

After a while, I called and asked B whether everything was ok. B said everything went well though he needed to wait a little longer for a nurse to release Ryan. I asked B, where did they put Ryan? B slowly told me, in a tupperware. My heart just crushed when I heard that and couldn't possibly utter another question. So the only thing that I could said to B was drive safely.

Shortly after B arrived home, ustaz and his family turned up. They help us to "mandikan, kafankan and sembahyangkan" our little Ryan Aziz. B and I are forever grateful for their help and kindness. When we were about to go to the Haycombe Cemetery, ustaz's wife told me that we have a beautiful boy. I just smiled because I know Ryan had both of our great features..perasankan.

Waiting at the cemetery were our two close friends. They couldn't join the "solat jenazah" so we told them to wait for us at the cemetery instead. While B drove our car, I "kendong" my baby on my right hand and I could just feel his tiny weight. My sister was holding a jug of floral water. While we waited outside, B showed the documentation to Tracy (a Christian priestess) as she needed proof that Ryan and the documentation came together.

Tracy escorted us, to the Muslim graveyard. Ustaz "kepal2kan" tanah, helped by B and our two friends. This was done to help "mengiringkan" our Ryan to faced kiblat in his "liang lahad." Ustaz told my husband to buried our own son as he said it'll be more afdal. B, did as told and little by little our Ryan covered by soil. It's hard for me to watch my own son being buried but it was harder for B because he's burying our son. Anyway, what needs to be done need to be settled. We finished off by reciting doas and showering our son grave with floral water.

Ryan Aziz..Mummy and Daddy love you so much. May we meet again in Jannah.

Al-fatihah.

Thursday, 31 January 2008

one minute silent

We would to take this opportunity to inform all that we have lost our beautiful baby boy on the 29 January 2008 due to late miscarriage. We would like to apologise for not informing everyone this news personally and we do hope nobody will hold any grudges. We are still grieving and saddened by this incident. We love our baby so much but Allah love him more. We also realised that Allah knows what best for His ummat. Thank you to everyone that visited Wan at the hospital and sent those kind and sympathy messages to us, they really lifted our spirits. May Allah bless all of you, insyaAllah. Thank you.

Friday, 25 January 2008

BleEding lOve 2

My sister, B & I were having dinner at our friend's house in Royal Crescent last night. We had fried chicken (like KFC) and doner kebab. After finishing my dinner, I excused myself from the group as I had this inkling feeling that something was not right. Went to the loo and to my horror I passed an 1.5 inch blood clot and was bleeding. Arrggh..being pregnant for 15 weeks and 4 days, I felt shaken by the incident. Even though the bleeding was nothing new to me but not the blood clotting. I calmed myself and wrapped the specimen (blood clot) with toilet roll. Called B, ushered him to the toilet and told him what had happened while showing him the specimen.

Both of us decide not to go to A&E that night, as we wanted to see whether I'll bleed heavier or not and whether I'll have throbbing abdominal pain. I know most people might think it's insane and our decision doesn't make any sense but owh..never mind. Anyway, throughout the night I slept well and the next morning the bleeding was still there. So, we rushed to A&E and I registered myself.

A nurse came and showed us to our room, the same old room (by this time we've been here atleast five times). In the room, she took my blood pressure and body temperature and asked us a few questions. Then came a female A&E doctor and we explained everything. The fact that this is my third pregnancy with two previous miscarriages, spotting at week six throughout week eight and heavy bleeding initially at week thirteen and followed by light spotting till now plus the blood clot. Pheww..that was a lot of explanation from both B & I. The doctor then told us that she's going to listen to our baby heartbeat using doppler. Deep down I don't know what to expect. B and I just prayed that there is a heartbeat.

Wooww.. wooowwwwow..and the doctor told me that it's my heartbeat. Then came a significantly louder and quicker sound wooowww.. woooww.. wooowww.. woooow..alhamdulillah that is our baby heartbeat. The doctor told us that our baby heartbeat is normal and steady but she wanted us have an ultrasound as well just to make sure the growth of our baby is on the right track. However, the u/s clinic only open early in the morning so the best bet we need to come back on Monday. We said that's fine. So, the doctor said she need to have a quick chat with the gynaecologist to make sure it's ok for me to go home.


cont....

Wednesday, 23 January 2008

The Most Awaited Package

This package is important to both b & me. We've been waiting for this package for almost four weeks. The good news, I just received the most awaited package this afternoon. Yeay... When I heard someone knocked on the door, I knew it must be that package. After signing the paper, I just couldn't wait for B to come home to open the package together... Without any hesitation I opened the package and saw a white envelope. Opened the white envelope and I was looking for a letter. Nope..there's no letter. Ok..ok..calm down. Checked the passport and I smiled from ear to ear. Alhamdullillah..we're granted the Indefinite Leave to Remain (ILR or also known as PR). That's a huge a relieve for both of us. B left for work with a happy face..bless him.

Saturday, 19 January 2008

Demise of beloved uncle

Innalillahi wainna ilaihi raajiuun... We were saddened by the death of our beloved Uncle Teshi (my dad's youngest brother). Al-fatihah... His sudden death shocked the Wan clanz. We love him, but Allah almighty loved him more. Uncle Teshi..thoughtful, loving and ever so caring uncle. May you rest in peace and be amongst the soleh mukmin.

Tuesday, 6 November 2007

Pregnant

I'm pregnant and at the same time I'm spotting.
I'm nervous and B's excited.
God give us strength.

Saturday, 27 October 2007

Birthday

I am alive..
Thank God for His Blessing
Without Him I am invisible

I am loved..
Affections by B, Papa & Mama
Without them I am nobody

I am cherished..
Warmth given by dearest sisters and in-laws
Without them I am sad

I am adored...
Blessed by nieces and nephew
Without them I am empty

I am admired...
Kindness given by wanderful friends
Without them I am alone
Thank goodness for everything...
Above all...
Thanks Allah for giving me life...

Today is the day...
My day...
My Mama's day...
My Papa's day...
Without you, I would not make it.
Happy Birthday to Me o^_^o

Thursday, 23 August 2007

The Series of Uneventful and Eventful Events

Wednesday : 22 August 2007*
Sprained my left ankle..ouch

Thursday : 23 August 2007**
Invited a few good friends for dinner...
They are leaving UK to serve their country...
We will be serving them japanese cuisine...
Itadakimasu...!! hehehe...

Friday or possibly Saturday: 24 or 25 August 2007**
We are honoured to have our special guess from sheffield...
They will be staying at our modest house for few days...
Hopefully we will be out and about doing something interesting...


Uuh..oh...i hope, i wouldn't put too much strain on my left foot...


* the uneventful event
** the eventful event

Friday, 17 August 2007

Achievement

i was just settling down in the company's cafe...
when suddenly i was approached by my boss...
he was asking how i was feeling...
and i said "i am fine..thank you..."
in my mind..i kept asking...
oh god...is he going to cancel my leave...
oh no...please no...
suddenly he congratulated me...
me..being blur and confused...
i felt rather weird and astonished...

did i heard it right?
wow..haha...
i'm so happy...!!
thank you Allah o^_^o




lalalalalalala...
damdidumdidum...
tralalalalalalala...
hehehehehehe...
happiness always...

Saturday, 4 August 2007

The Spousal Chat

After the previous incident (please refer here).

B: B, I'm brave. *looking proud*
Me: *giving him this O_o look*
B: I'm brave right?
Me: You are foolish. *not looking at him*
B: Huh? So am I brave?
Me: You are foolish. (hee.. o^_^o i know b is brave and would take any necessary measure to protect me, it just i don't want him to get hurt unnecessarily).
B: That doesn't answer my question.
Me: Well, I'm not going to answer your question then and that's it.
B: Huh?? *giving me a blank look*




Damdeedeedum..deedum...
Who's looking?
I'm not looking tsst.. :P
Fine...
Damdeedeedum..deedum...
Happily

ScaRY..SpOOky..WeIrD... Part Three : The Aftermath

Zooomm...
The taxi was gone...
We were so glad and relieved...
At the same time, the incident left us feeling confused and scared...


B :
Lets, try and get some sleep.
Me: Yeah, ok.


But the fact was, i couldn't even closed my eyes. My mind was spinning..thinking what if those guys came back when i was all alone..arrgghh...Ok..ok..sleep..sleep... After more than an hour, i finally dozed off. Later that morning, B told me that he couldn't sleep as well. Owh, poor b. Anyway, before he was off to work, he gave me long list of caution and oh, despite the usually ones.


B : Please do take care ok, if anything just call me. (and so on)
B : Don't just open the door. Look whether it's a postman or whoever. If possible don't even open the door.
B : InsyaAllah nothing will happen.
Me: *just nodding*
B : I love you B.
Me: I love you too B.


The next thing i knew, i called mama. I told her everything. Mama was petrified. Oh no..i didn't mean to make her worried sick. But, the fact that we are both far apart, makes her even worried. Mama told me to be extra careful, report to the police and called the landlord (just to make sure it isn't his relative).

Mama called that afternoon. Sound worried as before, asking whether i did as told... Ermm no..:P. By now i could here papa's voice in the background sound as worried and concerned as mama. Oh..no..double worriers.. I felt so guilty making my parents feels that way...

Regardless, everything is ok now... Alhamdulillah. We hope there will be no more unexpected incidents happen. God forbid. So, everyone just be careful ok no matter where you are... Take care...




Hmm..huh?
Hmm..what?
Hmm..lalalala...
Hmm..dadidadida...
Owh..the usual tunes...
The one that we always hear...
That familiar beats...

Friday, 3 August 2007

ScaRY..SpOOky..WeIrD... Part Two : The Truth

Ddduumm...
I heard the door closed...
Oh good..what happened?
I just hope B is ok...
Thud..thud..thud..
I heard footsteps...
Going upstairs...
I brave myself to voiced out...


Me: B, are you ok?
B : I'm fine...


Feeling tiny bit relieved...


Me: What happened? What's wrong? Are you ok? (I suddenly became an instant FBI agent, hahaha)
B : Dunno...(sounding confused and puzzled).
B : This old guy was saying,"This is my house. I want to get my money in the kitchen to pay the taxi driver."
Me: Huh?!!!
B : That's what the guy told me repeatedly.
Me: Huh?!! But this is our house. We've been staying here for nearly five years now.
B : I know. That's what I told him that THIS is our house and shut the door.


I felt goosebumps all over my body. It's not possible this guy being living in our house without us knowing. Err...no..I think I watched too much thriller movies..hehe...


Me: How many of them?
B : Two
Me: Haa..TWO?!! Are they both old?
B : Nope!! The other one is a little boy.
Me: Little boy??? You mean he is like in primary school?
B : No. It's like this Kakak(sister) son.
Me: That's not little boy... That's teenager like doing A-levels...
B : Owh yaa...


Oh my god, B's description of little boy was totally waayyy offf... Anyway, I investigated him further. At the same time my hubby switched on our study lamp and looked outside the window. The old guy was still looking at our house.


Me: Is he our landlord?
(I know it's not the most intelligent question but somehow i felt the need to ask haha..:P).
B : No and I should know how our landlord looks like.
Me: Are they drunk?
B : I don't think so
Me: Is the boy threatening that old man?
B : No, I don't feel it that way coz he was holding/supporting this man's hand
Me: Weird?!!
B : I think I just gonna tell the taxi driver this is our house and not that old man house.
Me: WHAATTT!!! No way!! You are so not going out and tell them anything!! We don't know them and they could probably harm us, ok!!
B : Then what do you want me to do? Call the cops?
Me: *thinking* Well yes...
B : What's the cops number? (asking innocently) Is it 999?
Me: I dunno..yeah i think so... (when i was writing this, i think its funny that both of us didn't know the police station number. but, it was quite a different story before). By the time we tried to find out the number, the taxi was gone. Pheewww...!!!


continued...




Excuse me, it's mine
Excuse us, its ours
No, it's mine...
No, its ours...
Dussh...it's definitely ours!!
Shuh..shuh..go away...
and never comeback!! (smeagol from LOTR said these words..hahaha)

ScaRY..SpOOky..WeIrD... Part One : The Stand

Flap..flap...
Flap..flap..flap..continuously...
Knock..knock...
Knock..knock..knock..repeatedly...
I was awaken by this tiny noise...
Not loud but enough for me to detect it...
Having a supersonic ears (this is what B told me..haha)...
I could detect even a slightest noise or movements..(err..enough of that)
Anyway, I woke B up and asked whether he could here these noises...


B : Mmm..it must be our neighbour..
Me: Neighbour?!! What do you mean our neighbour?
(Mind you, our next door neighbour at the moment is having a house renovation, but I don't think they will knock anything down in the early hours..? I mean seriously early..!!).
Me: B, please..take a peek...(me, sound worried)


B, walking towards the window...


B : Ahhh..it just a taxi driver.
Me: Taxi?? We didn't ask for any taxi (at this moment, i felt very weird & uneasy).
Me: Or is it the taxi driver who got the wrong house? Anyway, what is the time now?
B : It's four o'clock.
Me: Four o'clock in the morning?!! Geez..!!
B : It's ok I'll go and check.
Me: Gulp..ok...(but inside i wanted to say "NO" pls)


Downstairs...
I could hear my hubby trying to communicate without opening the door.


B : Yes, can I help? (or so what i heard)


Suddenly I heard the sound of the door opened.
Ohh..no..this couldn't be good (my gut feeling was telling me...)
I could hear my hubby said... No..No..No..repeatedly...
I felt sick inside... I hope B is ok...
I was still in our bedroom (doing nothing), calling out for my hubby...


Me: B, is everything alright?


No, reply...silence... B..are you alright..?!!(I was screaming inside). I felt really sick...



continued....




knock..knock..
flap..flap..
what is it..?
don't want to know..
don't want to open..
just begone..

Tuesday, 24 July 2007

Wedding Anniversary, Mama & Papa!!

Happy Wedding Anniversary, Mama & Papa!!

May Allah blesses both of you with great happiness and health.
We hope that your companionship remains.
Your love, affections and passions towards each other are felt & shared by us too.
We are glad to still witness it.
Be good to each other and take care.


p/s: hope both of your were delighted with our surprise o^_^o




Boo..tee-hee...
Boo..hehehe...
Surprise!!